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makin' the best of it

Picked up my take-home traffic school at Blockbuster this evening. It costs easily twice as much as traditional traffic schools in the area, or the infinitely more efficient Online Traffic School. But those weren't options in my schedule, working around a full-time job and countless outside responsibilities. I haven't had a free moment 'til this weekend, I've used up all my extentions, and the signed certificate is due in court on Wednesday.

I'm a little resentful.

The tapes suck, by the way. I've used 'em before, five or six years ago. But I had been in the wrong that time, and was just grateful for the opportunity to clear the violation off my record. I had free time to throw away back then, too. You put up with a lot when those are your circumstances.

So, here I am, trying to justify why it's so darn important to have a car in the first place. I need it for work, which I need if I'm going to pay for all the costs associated with having a car. Like this humiliating waste of my most precious commodity, for example.

I went ahead and put the $54 on my father's credit card. He's the one who wanted me on this treadmill, after all. So, that covers the money. But the time.. How do I justify eight hours to go through these tapes a second time?

I could only think of one way. Check the mood icon, folks.

It's stupid and irresponsible, but the irony justifies all...


( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
Jul. 28th, 2002 12:53 am (UTC)
I don't think I've ever seen you drunk before. I wish someone was there interacting with you to tell us how this affects your behavior, if at all...

Jul. 28th, 2002 01:31 am (UTC)
Keep wishing.
You're not the first person to have expressed that thought.
     ...which means you're not the only person who will never see me drunk.

Some things just don't happen under scrutiny.
Jul. 28th, 2002 11:32 am (UTC)
You know that getting drunk alone is one of the signs of an alcohol problem...

Jul. 28th, 2002 11:55 pm (UTC)
Could a DUI vampire throw off the tests by drinking blood to offset the alcohol in their system?
No, no. You misunderstand.

"Under scrutiny" isn't a function of having witnesses. It's a function of having witnesses who focus unnaturally on your behavior. Of having the wrong witnesses. Which you have now been grouped with. I didn't mean to imply anything beyond that.

It's an autopilot response, really. Instinctive reflex, applicable to any number of subjects. With unspeakably few exceptions</a>, the only response to "I wanna see you ___________" is going to be "...and that's why you never will."

But your mistake wasn't in saying the words so much as believing them. And in the long run, it wasn't really a mistake, as we now know to avoid a confrontation that would have ended in awkwardness and violence. Straightforward incompatibility, identified and filed away.

See, you can't foster a trusting and comfortable environment when your companions are waiting for an opportunity to abuse that trust and make a spectacle of you. And the moment you compromise on that, you might as well be drinking alone.


But since you brought it up, when you're looking for signs of alcoholism, "drinks because they're frustrated or angry" is a much better clue.
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )


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