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mascots in ascots

I'm not sure why people think to eat chili when it's hot outside. Must be the name. "I could sure go for something chilly right now!" But, see, this doesn't fit. It's served hot, and the sensation of eating something spicy, well... it burns.

Whatever the reason, they've been comparing recipes on the radio lately, and it got me craving the stuff. I decided to hit Wendy's for lunch -- theirs is fast, cheap, and tolerable. I place my order, and sit next to the window to watch traffic go by.

For a moment, my vision is blocked by an unusual pedestrian. He's in a Frosty suit. You know, the frozen chocolate drink Wendy's serves? This guy's dressed up as one. Big topheavy costume, complete with giant puffy gloves and shoes.

This is more or less what goes through my mind:
  • In weather like this, it is only sensible to promote your coldest items.

  • It must be even hotter inside the costume.

  • This guy's probably getting minimum wage.

  • My job is better than his.

  • Maybe he's not an employee. I was just assuming he was. But when a new Star Wars film opens, you don't have to pay people to dress up as Stormtroppers -- this could be a fan.

  • I've been to one too many comic-book conventions.

  • I've not been to one as a corporate branded food product.

  • Why don't I own such a costume?
I drove past him on my way out. I waved to acknowledge him. He did not return the gesture. He was standing very still on the corner, perhaps to conserve energy. The costume might as well have been empty.

-----

In related news, there's a giant pink Care Bear handing out flyers on the street near my office. He's been there for months. Each time I walk past him, regardless who I'm walking with, I can count on that person to suggest we commit an act of unspeakable violence against him.

I like to imagine it's not a costume, and that the reason he's been on the street this long is that he's homeless and destitute. In my head, he's a wild animal, with claws and teeth for the hunting.

I try not to make eye contact.

Comments

( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
speedball
May. 22nd, 2005 10:35 am (UTC)
Care Bare?

That brings up disturbing mental images...
self
May. 22nd, 2005 01:09 pm (UTC)
Freudian slip
I actually had a conversation last week whose logical conclusion was that homeless men are probably, on average, very well endowed. I'm not saying the logic was sound, but that is where it concluded. So... when I fantasize about someone being homeless and destitute, I'm apparently adding several inches to their manhood.

Disturbing indeed!



Umm... Spelling corrected.
jenvargas
May. 29th, 2005 06:52 am (UTC)
Yay
You list office supplies as an interest. This is cool.
_allolex
Jun. 4th, 2005 07:10 am (UTC)
Musical baton
Hey,

The form bit:

I figure it's only fair to inform you that you've been tagged in the musical baton game. I'll forgive you if you gracefully decline to participate...

http://allolex.net/

< / form >

Since you haven't been updating much recently, but probably have been listening to music, I figure this might help. Anyway, I'm pretty curious to see what you listen to these days. ;)

-damon
self
Jun. 5th, 2005 10:05 pm (UTC)
Re: Musical baton
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )

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self
some guy

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